Yamhill Pub
- rainbowrandypdx
- Nov 15, 2023
- 2 min read
Updated: Feb 15, 2024
Welcome to the Yamhill Pub, where chaos reigns, the liquor flows liberally, and federal agents might just be keeping an eye on you. Let's take a saunter through this thrilling (or potentially chilling) establishment.
As you approach the bar at Yamhill Pub, you'll quickly realize that their beverage selection is like a library with only one book. The variety of liquors falls squarely into the "okay, nothing special" category. When it comes to uniqueness, they're about as inventive as a cheese sandwich - so nothing unique to report. However, things get a little crazy in the vodka-soda alcohol volume department, with a robust 14%. It's enough to make you feel like a human Molotov cocktail. As for value, the first round at $5 (short) is a good deal, and the second round gets even better at $4.50, featuring the ever-popular Rose City Vodka as their well of choice.
Step inside, and you'll be greeted by a cacophony that's loud but not loud enough to drown out your conversations. The soundtrack? Well, it's screamo and punk - so if you've ever dreamed of hearing a drill solo accompanied by a chainsaw quartet, you're in for a treat. The staff, surprisingly friendly, could probably tell you the story behind every stain on the walls. The bathroom, if you can find your way there amidst the visual graffiti feast, offers private quarters with skiing conditions that might be better suited for an avalanche.
As for attire, black T-shirts are available - because when you're the cool kid on the block, you can never have too many. Sadly, there's no lottery or pool to add extra layers of chaos.
The food selection at Yamhill Pub is about as standard as it gets. The prices are budget-friendly, but let's face it, who actually buys food here? We didn't venture into the culinary unknown during our visit, so the enigma of their food remains a mystery.
Yamhill Pub is conveniently located, just 1 or 2 blocks from all MAX lines, making it a hub for both those looking to socialize and those keeping a low profile. In terms of the surrounding area, it's near Pioneer Square, which gives it that touch of sketchiness, like a secret hideout from a spy thriller.
In a nutshell, Yamhill Pub is a chaos-filled playground, offering a visual graffiti spectacle that rivals an art museum's wildest dreams. It's a place where you might imagine federal agents watching from the shadows and where pissing off the wrong patron could lead to an impromptu wrestling match (and not in a good way). However, it's surprisingly welcoming, even though the bathrooms might evoke memories of months-old kitty litter. It's fun but edgy, and if the music takes a break, you might just find yourself surrounded by a symphony of whispers. So, if you're up for an unpredictable adventure, step right in - and remember, chaos is the name of the game.
🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌 (7 out of 10 bananas)
-Rainbow Randy 🌈
Yamhill Pub
223 SW Yamhill St, Portland, OR 97204
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